Dear River Island,
I love you to pieces. I love how comfortable your 6 inch heels are, I love how full your midi skirts are, I love your crop tops and jewelry and I definitely adore your sales. You definitely are my no 1 go to highstreet store. Even after your collaboration with Rihanna – which was hideous, btw!
So you’re great. And I love you.
But why, tell me WHY, why, in God’s name, would you sell THESE?
Behold, people: BIGFOOT’S SHOES (which could probably perform better as bricks, if you ask me)
Help me out here, I don’t get it…